We can guarantee most people have used some (or all) at some point, especially when explaining to friends and family who have no clue about cycling.
We’ve a few beauties in here but let us know if you have any more. Cycling is a sport of truth - said nobody ever!
1. “I was caught behind a crash”
What you really meant was: “The crash put me out of my misery”
2. “I missed the split”
What you really meant was: “I was so far down the back that when the elastic snapped and the peloton was split in two I was mercifully spared a hammering by being in the third group.”
3. “I didn’t see the move go”
What you really meant was: “I was a mile off the pace today and spent the first hour hanging on for dear life waiting for a break to go. Things were nice and easy then when it went and we only lost 12 minutes.”
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4. “I didn’t think the break would stay away”
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What you really meant was: “I was feeling okay but when the move went I thought ‘someone’ would chase but they never did.”
5. “I haven’t trained all week”
What you really meant was: “I’m massively under prepared, so I’m giving myself an excuse to DNF right here, right now.”
6. “This is just training for me”
What you really meant was: “I totally don’t care how I do…but if I happen to win it proves I’m unbelievable. If not, I’m still amazing for showing up.”
7. “The move that stuck is the one I wasn’t in.”
What you really meant was: “I had no more bullets in the chamber.”
8. “The course was too easy.”
What you really meant was: “I train on hills only so I’ve no chance in a flat race.”
9. “I’ve had a cold all week”
What you really meant was: “I’m slow and unfit.”
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